What's in a name: Jack or John

On a recent visit to my family home, we began talking about names we call one another. Mostly, we call each other by our given names. My mother told me that she and my father agreed that I would be named after my grandfathers "Jack" and "Alfred." Subsequently, I was given the name "John" with the explicit instructions that I was not ever to be called "John." My name would always be "Jack." I wish I knew something about my grandfathers and I have to explore the reasons why I was not to be called "John."

I was called "Jack" by many friends in the Worcester area where I grew up, but when I went to college it seemed easier for professors to call me "John," so I kept that name as my classmates became used to that name. It seemed official and formal, but it also represented a break into a world where I as an adult could make my own choices.

However, recent prayers and my mother's statements are causing me to go deeper into my prayer. The giving of names is very important. Am I to respect the desires of the family in giving me my name? I also wonder what name God wants to call me in prayer. I never asked. As names go deep into our identity and we are always moving to become our true selves, am I "Jack" or "John?" I have to see how this develops.